I Saw God Today

I've been to church

I've read the book

I know He's here

But I don't look

Near as often as I should

Yeah, I know I should

His fingerprints are everywhere

I just slowed down to stop and stare

Opened my eyes and man I swear

I saw God today

("I Saw God Today," by George Strait)

A child's footprint. A cluster of holly berries. A flock of robins. (I've never even heard of robins flocking...) These minute details jumped out at me as I took a walk along the riverfront after classes ended today. When I started walking, I was concerned about where I was headed; but somewhere in the middle of my trek, I stopped thinking in terms of destination and started thinking in terms of destiny.

The past two weeks have undeniably been some of the hardest weeks of my life to date. I have been faced with a difficult problem, one I thought (or had convinced myself) that I had long overcome. Hidden things, however, have a way of coming to light.

"There is nothing concealed that will not be disclosed, or hidden that will not be made known."

-Luke 12:2, NIV

Christ came to proclaim freedom for captives; therefore He was not content for me to continue to strain and struggle under the burdens of my past. In order to help me face things long buried, He chose to work through my fiance and through my friends. They sat with me in silence and shock, like the friends of Job (Job 2:11-13). They held me--both spiritually and physically--when I cried.

You're holding her hand

You're straining for words

You're trying to make sense of it all

She's desperate for hope

Darkness clouding her view

She's looking to you

Just love her like Jesus

Carry her to Him

His yoke is easy

His burden is light

You don't need the answers

To all of life's questions

Just know that He loves her

And stay by her side

Love her like Jesus

("Love Them Like Jesus," by Casting Crowns)

One brave soul dared to ask me some of the hardest questions I have ever had to hear, and I know what it cost to ask them. They were heartbreaking, infuriating questions that brought out the ugliest side of who I am--my deepest defensive instincts. I knew the answers, though I did not like them much. I wrestled and fought with my knowledge of what now needs to be done, and I have been convicted at every turn. My thoughts, emotions, and prayers thoroughly exhausted me.

I needed to escape, to take a break and just breathe; today, at the urging and in the company of a friend, I did just that. I was told to bring a jacket and wear good walking shoes; nothing else. Our conversation was scattered and brief, more like a series of short narratives, as we walked through neighborhoods and past waterfront views that reminded me of my childhood.

Those two hours were hours well spent. My senses were heightened; every sight, sound and smell stood out to me in a unique way. I began to consider the powerful Creator of such 'simple' wonders. A familiar hymn came to mind, one line of which stood out to me:

This is my Father's world

Oh, let me ne'er forget

That though the wrong seems oft so strong

God is the ruler yet

("This Is My Father's World," by Maltbie D. Babcock)

Because I slowed down, and took time to breathe, and actually look... I could see God at work everywhere. I could see evidence of His providence all around me. I had known all along that He was there, but once I gave him my full attention, He displayed His glory. He took the time to painstakingly unveil Himself to me today and bring peace to my troubled soul.

I cannot say what tomorrow will bring. But I saw God today.

"Then Jesus told him, 'Because you have seen me, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.'"

-John 20:29, NIV