"Jesus said, 'Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.'" -Matthew 19:14
I hardly know where to begin--I have not blogged in weeks, not for lack of inspiration, but for lack of time and patience. I don't like to write unless I can take the time to think and write well. I've been busy, busy, busy getting things ready for school--making lists, filling out paperwork, getting my immunizations updated *shudder*. At this point, if I have to sign my name on one more piece of paper, I might just scream.
But, in the midst of scrambling to meet various deadlines, God slammed me to a screeching halt. Being a counselor at a week of Park Springs camp sounded like a lot of fun... months ago. But just last Saturday, as I was tossing shorts and t-shirts into a backpack, all I could think of was the stuff at home that I was leaving undone... for yet another week. I was focused on the external; God, as always, was focused on the eternal.
"'For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,' declares the LORD. 'As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.'" -Isaiah 55:8-9
I had never been to Park Springs as a camper; Bible Bowl had always completely occupied my summer. So, going into last week, I had no idea what to expect. I'd been told that I was going to be a cabin mom. (Come again?) I'd been asked to be a family leader. (A what?) I'd been asked to teach fourth and fifth grade students about personal devotions. (Oh boy...) "What have I gotten myself into?" was the phrase I silently repeated to myself on the drive up to the camp.
When I arrived, though, all my mental background noise faded into silence. All I could do was look around in wonder... and breathe. For the first time in weeks, I stopped and listened to God.
"'Be still, and know that I am God.'" -Psalm 46:10a
The theme of the week was "Primal Worship." Dan Hipply, Involvement Minister at my home church, was the camp dean, and he defined the week this way: Primal means first or original; of first importance; fundamental. Worship is reverent honor; to hold in the highest position of importance. In other words, our first priority--our essential task--is to worship God. He must be foremost in our minds, hearts, and lives. I know the week was meant for the kids, but that week-long message resounded in my heart.
GOD HAS TO COME BEFORE ALL MY DEADLINES.
It's strange to me, how quickly I can lose sight of things I've always known. My life always reaches a new level of chaotic every time my focus shifts from God even slightly. All the stress and worry of the weeks prior to camp could have been avoided, if I had just taken the time to remember that God is guiding and directing my life.
"'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the LORD, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'" -Jeremiah 29:11
The entirety of last week was spent focusing on God, from Arming for the Day (morning devos) with my tribe each morning to the Evening Flame (campfire) each night, every thought, every heartbeat, every breath, was about God. It was about talking to God, listening to God, learning about God, praising God, serving God... there was no way to avoid a God-focus last week. All of the usual distractions were removed. It was all about Him.
It seemed that the week flew by; one moment we were arriving, and the next moment we were packing up to leave again. I cannot even begin to recount everything that occurred in between! But it struck me, that week of camp, that even when you do not know what God is doing, so long as you are willing and obedient, you will serve His purposes. I am a detail-oriented person (a dalmatian, for those of you who know what that means). I like to know the what, when, where, why, and how of everything. When God asks me to do something, my first response--I am sad to say--is not action. I begin by gathering information and weighing my options... when really all the information I need is God's direction, and the only options I have are obedience and disobedience.
I thank God that he made me willing and obedient, because the past week with these kids has been amazing. They have surprised me at every turn with their joy, their positivity, their diligence, and the amazing level of excitement they display towards their Heavenly Father. When was the last time I was that excited about God? I've been serious about God, yes... but excited? Enthusiastic? Perhaps it's time for an attitude check.
By the end of the week, I had formed new friendships with my fellow counselors and close connections with the kids. I had listened to their stories. I had prayed with them; I even had the chance to pray with one young girl as she asked Jesus into her life. There is nothing quite like saying the Great Confession and hearing a child's soft, sincere voice repeat it after you; it is impossible to describe. Her life will be changed forever by that prayer... and even as clueless and clumsy as I can be sometimes, I was a part of that. It's a humbling feeling.
As I go into the rest of my year, with Atlanta just around the corner and MACU looming on the horizon, I know I will carry the memory of this week with me. Like the sparkles that dance in front of your eyes after a camera has flashed, so my experiences at camp will continue to influence the way I perceive the rest of my year. I pray that I can view it through child-like eyes of faith, worshiping God first and foremost.
