(Below is a letter I recently sent to a dear friend. Portions have been edited/omitted for privacy's sake.)
Dear Elisha,
You are a beautiful person; a true servant of God. Your letter was truly a delight to me; I loved my break, and I love being back here at school, but plenty of hard things have happened since I have been gone, and your letter lifted my spirits in the best way possible.
"I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth." (3 John 1:4, ESV)
God has impeccable timing. Just yesterday, when it seems that your letter was already on its way, I was experiencing severe self-doubt. I was wondering if I really have any impact or influence at all, or if I just stubbornly and pridefully think so. Satan was whispering his masterful lies and heavy accusations all day and all night long. "Your standards and expectations are too high; the things you want to enable others to accomplish are impossible; you have compromised your integrity too many times; you are no longer an effective servant of God; you are weaker now than you have ever been." I prayed that God would help me to discern the truth and reject the lies, and then your letter came, reminding me of the way God's power is made perfect in human weakness, and of the great things God has worked in your life through me.
Dietrich Bonhoeffer once said, "To be called to a life of extraordinary quality, to live up to it, and yet remain unconscious of it, is indeed a narrow way." I am trying my best to walk that narrow way. Oh, Elisha, you have no idea what balm your words were to the seething wounds of my heart! I laughed for sheer joy as I read them, and I am crying now. I love you.
I too have been feeling a shift fast approaching our relationship; it has already happened, in many ways--we just haven't put it into words. It pains me, but it is the good kind of pain. Just last night, I was telling my boyfriend how much joy it gave me to know that you stopped following me a long time ago, and ran after Christ with reckless abandon. As John the Baptist would say:
"He must become greater; I must become less." (John 3:30, NIV)
I will always love you. I will always be there to encourage and help you, if I can. But He has taken you out of my hands, and it is beautiful to see.
I pray that God will fill your heart with dreams, and that faith gives you the courage to dare to do great things. I'm here for you, whatever this life brings. So, let my love give you roots, and help you find your wings. I have had the very great privilege of coming alongside you in your journey with God; I too am sad that this chapter is closing, but, "there's room for a little more" to be written, as Frodo said to Samwise before he sailed away. I recently began rereading John C. Maxwell's book, "Becoming a Person of Influence." I have included a quote below:
"The highest level of influence you can have in others' lives is the multiplication level. As a multiplying influencer, you help people you're influencing to become positive influencers in the lives of others and pass on not only what they have received from you, but also what they have learned and gleaned on their own." (pg. 8)
By God's grace, things have come full circle. I have accomplished the work He gave me to do in your life, and even more besides. You no longer need me; you have outgrown me. And that, precious one, was the goal all along. I praise God that He enabled me to do right by you, and pour much of myself into you. It was a worthy investment. You are going to accomplish great things for the kingdom of God. I prayed, dear one, at the very start of all this, that if God's whole purpose for my life was only to influence you, then that would be enough for me. I promise you, it is more than enough.
I have recently begun to be convicted of the need to find another to mentor and disciple; I was overjoyed to hear of your desire to do the same. Just as the investment I have in you will reap heavenly dividends I may never know of until God calls me home, so will your investment in another. Be patient. Remain passionate. Hope for the best and prepare for the worst. There is nothing written here that you do not know already, but it is good to be reminded.
"For this very reason, make every effort to supplement your faith with virtue, and virtue with knowledge, and knowledge with self-control, and self-control with steadfastness, and steadfastness with godliness, and godliness with brotherly affection, and brotherly affection with love. For if these qualities are yours and are increasing, they keep you from being ineffective or unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. For whoever lacks these qualities is so nearsighted that he is blind, having forgotten that he was cleansed from his former sins. Therefore, brothers, be all the more diligent to make your calling and election sure, for if you practice these qualities you will never fall. For in this way there will be richly provided for you an entrance into the eternal kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.
Therefore I intend to remind you of these qualities, though you know them and are established in the truth that you have. I think it right, as long as I am in this body, to stir you up by way of reminder." (2 Peter 1:5-13, ESV)
Expect times of testing, but do not lose heart. We must go through the valley to stand upon the mountain of God. Sorrow may last for the night, but joy comes with the morning.
All that being said, I love you. You are very near to my heart, and are continually in my prayers. Let me know what you need, and I will stand in the gap on your behalf, anytime. I know you will continue to have great need of prayer.
I want you to know that I know what you mean when you say that every day seems to be so long, yet time seems to pass so quickly. I have felt that time is rushing by; I have wanted desperately for it to slow down. It happens in a blink, in a flash, in the time it takes to look back. I try to hold on tight, but there's no stopping time. But I don't have to wonder what I have done with my life, because of you. You are my legacy; my letter of recommendation, and my testimony. If I have left an indelible mark upon you, then you have left a greater one upon me.
"You yourselves are our letter of recommendation, written on our hearts, to be known and read by all. And you show that you are a letter from Christ delivered by us, written not with ink but with the Spirit of the living God, not on tablets of stone but on tablets of human hearts." (2 Corinthians 3:2-3, ESV)
"We give thanks to God our Father for all of you, constantly mentioning you in our prayers, remembering before our God and Father your work of faith and labor of love and steadfastness of hope in our Lord Jesus Christ. For we know, brothers, loved by God, that He has chosen you, because our gospel came to you not only in word, but also in power and in the Holy Spirit and with full conviction. You know what kind of men we proved to be among you for your sake. And you became imitators of us and of the Lord, for you received the word in much affliction, with the joy of the Holy Spirit." (2 Thessalonians 1:2-6, ESV)
"For we never came with words of flattery, as you know, nor with a pretext for greed--God is witness. Nor did we seek glory from people, whether from you or from others, though we could have made demands as apostles of Christ. But we were gentle among you, like a nursing mother taking care of her own children. So being affectionately desirous of you, we were ready to share with you not only the gospel of God but also our own selves, because you had become very dear to us." (2 Thessalonians 2:5-8, ESV)
The spring break trip is coming up, and I am full of excitement. There is deep joy in this anticipation. It will only be five days, but it will be a taste of the rest of my life. A chapter of my life is drawing to a close, and a new one is opening. Plans for the summer are underway; it will be a unique growing and stretching experience, and I can hardly wait. I am counting the cost of a life with Christ more now than I ever have. I will not lie; I am afraid of what it will mean to live the life to which I am called. If it doesn't break your heart, it isn't love. But like Jephthah, I will keep my vow. I will pay the price willingly, however painful it may be. I have wept and prayed over it, and begged for security and guarantees. But Aslan is not a tame lion; He makes no such promises. I must walk by faith alone, and trust that whatever pain may come is for my good, or His.
What wonders God hath wrought! He makes beautiful things out of dust; He makes beautiful things out of us. A kaleidoscope is broken glass that makes a pretty picture when the pieces fall. I wish that they could stay the same, but just one turn rearranges it all. And it's still beautiful. We have walked through valleys together, and we have ascended mountain heights. We are completely changed, yet more of ourselves than we ever were. And what we will be has not yet been made known. I can hardly wait to see what God will do with you, beloved.
"Beloved, we are God's children now, and what we will be has not yet appeared; but we know that when He appears we shall be like Him, because we shall see Him as He is." (1 John 3:2, ESV)
I am grateful beyond measure for your loving encouragement and prayers. They mean so much to me. You mean so much to me. I feel God doing a new work in me this semester; my ears are tingling with His words. He has put the heart back into me, and I think that I am quite ready for another adventure.
"Not that I have already obtained this or am already perfect, but I press on to make it my own, because Jesus Christ has made me His own. Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what is behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Jesus Christ." (Philippians 3:12-14, ESV)
God is faithful even when we are faithless, and He gives us strength for every stride. I am overjoyed by the blessing of your friendship and fellowship, which is a constant source of encouragement and renewal for me. I pray that I will continue to be the same for you. Our relationship will grow and change as we do, but our love for each other will never change, because it is anchored in our common faith and love for God.
"A threefold cord is not quickly broken." (Ecclesiastes 4:12b, ESV)
God is so good; mercy, love and undying patience are poured out daily as His heart aches to bring us home, and as we yearn for him with similar longing.
I want to close this letter with an expression of love, but I find no adequate words.
"Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith, be courageous; be strong. Do everything in love." (1 Corinthians 16:13-14, NIV)
Love Beyond Reason,
Elijah
"I thank God whom I serve, as did my ancestors, with a clear conscience, as I remember you constantly in my prayers night and day. As I remember your tears, I long to see you, that I may be filled with joy. I am reminded of your sincere faith, a faith that dwelt first in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice and now, I am sure, dwells in you as well. For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of god, which is in your through the laying on of my hands, for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.
Therefore do not be ashamed of the testimony about our Lord, nor of me His prisoner, but share in suffering for the gospel by the power of God, who saved us and called us to a holy calling, not because of our works but because of His own purpose and grace, which He have us in Christ Jesus before the ages began, and which now has manifested through the appearing of our Savior Christ Jesus, who abolished death and brought life and immortality to light through the gospel, for which I was appointed a preacher and apostle and teacher, which is why I suffer as I do. But I am not ashamed, for I know whom I have believed, and I am convinced that He is able to guard until that Day what has been entrusted to me.
Follow the pattern of the sounds words that you have heard from me, in the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus. By the Holy Spirit who dwells within us, guard the good deposit entrusted to you." (2 Timothy 1:3-14, ESV)
